| I am sick of being cyptic i need to get this out. |
[Nov. 11th, 2008|09:40 pm] |
And all the times you wanted out, you never said a thing about. How we would just become the ships inside of a bottle/ Breakin' down, sails fallin' off/Tryin' to stay afloat inside a place you can't survive. Are we breakin' down? 'Cause I don't wanna know if there's another part of me. Don't wanna feel if I'm alive. Don't wanna smell the bed where we used to sleep. Just wanna walk away from the ashes. Take the fact that I've been burned. And maybe let you know I'm still standin'. If you miss it again, miss it again, I'm around
A few of my friends have filled up most of your friends pages with little tidbits of remakrs, and things. I have gotten three (i think?) phone calls from Silv today, I have been in the worst mood there is. Why? Because of something over the internet, something that maybe shouldn't of happened. Something that had been building up inside me for awhile because I really dislike not being told when I piss someone off, or do something wrong. As much as you say that wasn't the case, it has been over the past few months and i know it. I know when I get blocked, I know when I get ignored, I know when you leave a chat because of a comment I made. I am not stupid, but I never said I was the smartest, but I can tell that we were drifting apart a long time ago. It just hurts, in the end it hurts, why does it hurt? Because I gave so much into a friendship and then in the end I am being told I didn't understand, wich we both know is total bullshit because I know I am the most understanding person in the world who somtimes wait up till god knows how long because someone (not you anyone) says that will be online, the next day being told somthing came up, and I don't care. I can be ignored, and know it and i will still forgive you. I take apolgy after apolgy from EVERYONE in this world, (not just you). I am the first person to want to help someone out if they need it. If I have the money, its yours. If i can do something for you, I will. Its how I always been. I have this thing where I can look past peoples flaws and love them anyways. You can fight with me a million times and I will still forgive you and let you back in. Its how I always been. It takes a lot to really hurt me, it really does. But I am hurt, I feel hurt, and you really were the last person I expect this from. I joked and said "remind me to never get you mad" never thinking that might be me some day. And I am sorry for being a ball of engery, but having ups and downs and mood swings, i am sorry for being an only child and needing some attentions. I am sorry for so much more, but all i ever asked was if I do something wrong for you to tell me, and you never did that. Shutting someone out isnt the right way of doing things, Taking days to reply to an email isnt the right way to go about it. All you needed to do was say "you didnt do anything i just need my time' rather then shutting out the one person you said if they did somthing you wouldnt talk to them. To shut out the person who always was there for you even if you didn't want her to be, and then getting pissed because when a good person, a really good person asks her whats wrong and she tells that person whats wrong, you start a whole new bullshit of people blaming you. Thats not the case, because see friends do that. when someone is WRONG they ask whats wrong and the other person tells them isntead of acting like the other person is to blame for what is wrong. no one did anything wrong here, in the end it is one big miss understanding. but maybe next time you have a friend you will know shutting someone out because maybe one day your not feeling so good, they are in a great mood, and all you need to do is tell them that, it might completly change the cituation. |
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I was ![[info]](http://www.insanejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) flintskidmark |
[Feb. 10th, 2008|01:04 am] |
"Don't forget you are alive. Because when you are walking down around the city, or when you are in a bad mood, you can stop, and be like; Hey! I am alive! I don't know what the next second will be" - Joe Strummer>
project 365 joshbeckett |
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[Feb. 10th, 2008|01:04 am] |
I've decided to keep track of all the movies I see this year. Most of these are in theaters, some movies people have told me I should check out, or movies I've been wanting to see but haven't. Not moivies I have seen 1000 times and know all the lines to. I will rate them, with  , 5 being best, 1 bein least. Lets see if i can get to 100.
( 2008 in movies )
Comments on suggestions of movies, are always loved. If a movie is suggested to me, it will be stated before the rating. |
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